PP 094: Take Life One Slice at a Time (3 Life Lessons Learned From Loving Pizza Pt 2)
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Take Life One Slice at a Time
Today, we continue this trail of crusty breadcrumbs with the Three Life Lessons Learned From Loving Pizza series.
It'd be swell of you to stop what you're doing right now and go read Life Lesson Numero Uno from last week. Regardless, I'll give you a quick refresher.
At its core, Life Lesson #1 is accepting the fact that You Can't Make Everyone Happy, You're Not Pizza. I've learned this the hard way, as I've baked people-pleasing into my life's crust. It's taken me a long time to realize that I couldn't and still can't create for the masses.
Attracting the right people to your tribe is possible by staying in your own lane and creating work that's true to yourself. I also equip you with two ways to fight back against comparison (you should really check it out).
With that refresher out of the way, I'm about to dive deeper than a Chicago Deep Dish Pizza. I'm going to peel back another layer of cheese and share more of my backstory—things are about to get real.
I hope you're hungry for this second helping. Life Lesson #2 is all about Taking Life One Slice at a Time.
My goal for you after you devour this delectable episode: to be jazzed out of your gourd to make shit happen for yourself.
Big Dreams, Bigger Let Downs
Not only do I admit to being a people pleaser, but I'm also a creature of little patience.
I wanted everything good in life to happen quickly—just like how quick it is to reheat pizza in the microwave.
Whether it was becoming a starter in sports, getting swole in the gym, to watching the clock in class...I wanted the end result in the shortest amount of time possible.
After graduating high school, I thought I was onto something big. Although we sucked as a team in sports, I got a taste of the spotlight and made a name for myself playing football as a wide receiver.
I thought I was the shit because I was getting heavily recruited by D2 and D3 schools. After losing my entire life, I knew I wanted to go somewhere that had a winning culture.
One little campus visit to Wartburg College, a private school of 1,500 in Waverly, Iowa, and I knew I was at home.
It fit everything I was looking for:
there was a strong focus on diversity and progressivism
it was close enough to home but far enough away that my parents couldn't bug me every day
the student body was similar to the size of my high school (I thought this was an advantage for sports)
it was a national powerhouse in athletics—which clearly was the deciding factor
Unfortunately for me, my dreams of becoming a stud college football player blinded me to the sheer amount of debt I was about to take on.
Big Man on a Little Campus
Back in 2006, I walked into summer camp thinking I was going to be the man. Safe to say, I was delusional.
This was, by far, the greatest mental and physical challenge of my life. I was out of shape, and the competition was bananas. I was competing against over a hundred people at wide receiver, and the starters were All-Conference studs.
The worst part? I got acquainted with a new bully—the head coach.
This guy made my life a living hell. He would tear me down in front of anyone and everyone.
He stripped me of all my confidence. Football wasn't fun anymore, and I feared making any mistakes.
My freshman year I almost gave in and quit. However, close teammates and my friend, Coach Paul Mugan, convinced me to gut it out.
I slowly worked my way up the ranks and carved out a role on the scout team. One game, I jumped out of this world to make a Sportscenter Top 10-worthy one-handed catch. While in the air, two defenders wrapped me up and drove me into the ground.
As I made contact, I heard a loud pop followed by a sharp pain that felt like Jason Vorhees was stabbing my spine with his machete. After two weeks of toughing it out, I went to the doctor and got an MRI. The results showed that I had herniated and bulging discs between my L3–L5 vertebrae, along with a twisted pelvis and pinched nerves running down my left leg.
I ended up receiving injections around and in my spine followed by three months of intense physical therapy. It was complete torture, but I kept my eyes on the prize.
With the green light to play again in sight, I got word that our head coach accepted a new coaching position out-of-state. It seemed as if the stars were aligning, and the adversity I had overcome was leading me to my shining moment.
False Hope
During spring practice of 2008, I was back to flying around, making plays, and having fun again.
Everything was perfect until I threw my back out AGAIN in a 5 AM morning lifting session. This time, I jetted straight to the doc in hopes he could patch me up so I could keep this momentum going for summer practice.
This time around, the doctor gave me the news I feared the worst. I remember like it was yesterday when the doctor said, "If you want to walk when you're 40, you have to quit playing football. Your body can't take another hit."
Yes, I bawled my eyes out—the news absolutely crushed my soul. I overcame all this pain and stacked up mountains of private student loan debt...only to have my dream ripped away from me.
I faced two choices:
Transfer to a local community college to finish my design degree.
Finish my education at Wartburg, stay with my football family, and become a student coach.
I reluctantly chose the latter, but it cost me...and I'm not talking about tuition.
Going into my junior year, I began to self-destruct and spiral out of control. I had been a loser my entire life, so why would things change now?
I had convinced myself that I wasn't meant to be happy and find success. The world was against me, and I was a victim who needed everyone to feel sorry for me.
That year, we had a historic run and finished in the top 8 of the nation. You'd think I would've been happy, but I was bitter as fuck. It tortured me to watch my teammates live out my dream of catching touchdowns, making plays, and basking in glory.
I spent my last two years of college partying and living it up with my boys because YOLO.
Leading up to graduation in May 2010, I put no love or attention into my portfolio or sought out job opportunities. In my mind, I had great work, and I thought my pizza tendencies would allow me to easily land a job like I had in the past.
Yet again, another rude awakening.
Rock Bottom & Flipping Switches
When I graduated, I couldn't get a job because my portfolio was hot trash. Plenty of businesses told me they weren't interested, but the majority never responded. Instead of me owning up to my faults—of not investing the effort at school—I blamed the world.
Discouraged and defeated, I moved back home to live with my parents. My first job was serving at Newton's Cafe and smelling like tenderloins each day.
I was out of shape, overweight, partying every day, and experimenting with any drug I could find to numb the pain. In the summer of 2010, I tip-toed the edge of, not only quitting art, but also taking my own life.
The comparison trap had literally robbed me of all my joy and happiness. I wanted what everyone else around me had: from a successful job, better body, more money, nicer car, etc.
No one knew what I was going through because I bottled it all up. I couldn't fix this overnight; I slowly had to climb out of this hole.
My life began to shift back for the better once I started getting back in the gym to build up my confidence again. Although it felt pointless, I stuck with my art—creating t-shirt designs along with logos and tattoos— for friends at $50 a pop.
In three years, I bounced around between serving, coaching high school football, even personal training until I finally got the call.
New Perspective on Life
On a Saturday morning in early 2013, I got a call from a guy frantically looking to replace his graphic designer who had quit on the spot. He had heard my name from three separate people the day bef0re, as they had been silently observing my work on Facebook.
When I accepted the job, a switch "flipped" inside me...and it I truly changed my perspective on life. It showed me that I could make shit happen by having some grit and putting in the work.
From that day on, I become an absolute savage with my art and design. I spent my time in between projects at work reading articles, watching tutorials, and building a killer portfolio. Outside of work, I rediscovered my love for drawing and stumbled across lettering and Instagram.
With my revamped portfolio, I landed the job I'm currently at within two weeks. During this time, I also started Perspective-Collective as an Instagram account.
A lot of good things have happened since that switch flipped, but none of it has been overnight. Everything has been a day-by-day grind building this new world where I can thrive.
I'm guilty of wanting my dreams to manifest out of thin air, but shit just doesn't happen that way. It's impossible to climb Mt. Everest overnight—just like it's impossible to eat an XL Papa John's pizza in one bite.
This drawn out life story is what taught me Life Lesson #2: the importance of Taking Life One Slice at a Time.
Get Familiar with Failure
Pursuing your dream is an uphill climb. As I mentioned in episode 91, the closer you get achieving your personal legend, the more this unseeable force will try to deter you.
You can't avoid adversity, but you can learn to face and embrace it.
I admit I'm one big failure.
I've been failing my entire existence in every facet of life. Because of this, I'm able to be alive and creating something that matters.
As cheesy as it sounds, you gotta continue to fail forward and fuck up fast to find your groove.
I'm no expert, but I can definitely give you three ways you can get familiar with failure quickly.
1. Divorce Your Comfort Zone
Operating within your safe little bubble makes it hard to stimulate growth.
One of the best things I ever did for myself was to leave Iowa and attend Creative South Conference four years ago. I didn't know a soul, but I was able to connect with like-minded people and catch a glimpse of my creative potential.
From there, I found an online community and took up blogging. Within a year, I was back on that stage giving a speech that radically jump-started my career.
None of this would've happened had I not rattled the cage and acted on something that made me completely uncomfortable.
2. Marry the Process
It's so easy to get caught up in the end product you put into the world. I understand how easy it can be to get caught up in the end product you put out into the world. Again, like in the book The Alchemist, it isn't about reaching the destination; it's about the growth that's transpired along the way.
This is your creative path in a nutshell. True growth happens behind closed doors...when you're grinding away when no one is watching.
The daily grind consists of pouring hours, weeks, months, and years into studying, practicing, posting, marketing yourself, and failing.
Fall in love with the process. The end result will take care of itself.
3. Say YES & Figure it Out
THIS. IS. EVERYTHING.
What scares you the most?
Seek that shit out and aggressively attack it. You'll deliver the most value from the place of your greatest fears.
View fear as your intuition nudging you to the person you're supposed to become.
I always wanted to do public speaking and murals. I put myself in a position to be finally asked to do both... and it absolutely terrified me. Every bone in my body wanted to scream no, but I thankfully said yes.
Both 'wishful desires' have now turned out to be two things that light my soul up when I get a chance to do them. They also allow me to make an impact on something greater than myself.
Say YES, and throw yourself into the fire.
Keep Swinging
I'm a sports junkie and former football coach. Every sport is a physical game, but more importantly, it's a mental game between the ears.
Sports was my best teacher for failing fast. If a play doesn't go your way, you have to shake it off and get ready to go again.
This is how baseball works. You can't hit a home run every time you're up to bat. It's impossible and way too much to expect from yourself.
However, the only way to put yourself in a position to hit a home run is by getting up to the plate in the first place.
You're going to strike out—hit pop flies or grounders into double plays. There's no way around it. In order to hit a dinger that could change your life, you have to get as many at-bats as possible and keep swinging.
Quantity Leads to Quality
Queue your creative career. It takes mountains of shitty work and failed attempts to discover your best work, style, and voice that an audience or target client resonates with.
There are so many articles, speeches, and motivational quotes that put the emphasis on Quality over Quantity.
If you think about it, how the hell do you get to Quality without Quantity?
In baseball terms, you're just one at-bat and swing away from crushing a ball out of the park.
“In creative terms, you're just one scroll or swipe away from having your work discovered by the right person who could change your life.”
The key is to consistently create, share work, and remind people you exist. The more shitty work you create and share, the sooner you can mine for that gold within you and get discovered.
Don't Lose Sight of Why You Started
Striking out while searching for your gold can be defeating. Failure can blind you from why you started chasing this dream in the first place.
I started drawing long ago to escape the bullying. It allowed me to create my own world where I was safe and free.
It also brought joy into people's lives, like my parents and siblings, when I'd make them a cruddy hand-drawn card.
There have been many times where I sucked the fun out of it because I tried to You're Not Pizza
I'm guilty of solely creating for the admiration and meaningless vanity metrics, only to let poor engagement convince me to delete my post.
Definitely, use social media as a tool, but when you get too wrapped up in the stats, it can rob you of the joy of creating.
Here's a permission slip to you, and more importantly myself, to remember why you started and to give yourself a break.
Give Yourself a Break
As long as you're showing up and pouring some type of effort and time into your dream, then you're already doing more than most.
Doing something is always better than doing nothing, and done is always better than perfect.
Always remember that your 70, 80, and 90% will trump someone's goose egg (0%).
Enjoy Life By the Slice
Today's life lesson all boils down to patience and grit.
Trying to eat a full pizza in one bite is bound to end in a disaster and waste. It's much easier to take one bite and one slice at a time. Even better, you get to savor the flavor along the way.
Treat your creative dream like a marathon instead of a sprint. The daily grind is fueled by failing fast and often.
Stick with me here; next week we tackle Life Lesson #3. In this episode, I'll discuss to how to take the shit in stride while working your way to the highlight reels.
Support the Series With the Limited Pizza Party Sticker Pack
To celebrate this 3 part series, I created a Pizza Party Sticker Pack that is made up of the 3 Life Lesson designs. You can get yours now with FREE US SHIPPING!
Shownotes
Episode references:
Dose of Inspiration: @ShaunaParmesan
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CREDITS
Music - Blookah
Executive Assistant - Paige Garland
Photo & Video Specialist - Colton Bachar
Social Media Coordinator - Hannah Schick
Animation Specialist - Greg D'Amico